What the goals mean:
Weapon Twins: Have someone use the same weapon as you in the enemy team.
Oooh, shiny!: Have 5 or more Gold Aerosprays in a solo/duo queue.
Toxicity at it's finest: have a person using the dab on shiver's team.
Maximum sweep: Have 80% or more turf at the end of a match
Not good? No problem: Get 10 or more kills with a weapon you don't play with normally.
On a roll!: Win 5 games in a row in 5 different teams (Stop after each match)
Janitor's Overtime: Score 1500 points in one game
Almighty victory: Win a solo X333 battle
I just want to talk with him: Have a teammate disconnect at the beginning of a X100/X333 match
Depression Givers: Have 3 Wipeouts distributed to the ennemies
Fly Swatter: Get a Brella Shield Bash or a Brush Bash kill, or roll on 3 people in the same match as a roller
It always gotta happen: Have a DC on either side
One Man Army: Make a Wipeout by yourself. No help from your teammates.
Soda Time!: Drink a whole tacticooler over the duration of a game
The MVP: Get the most splats OR paint on your team
The PVM: Get the least splats OR paint on your team and win
Five Star Faux: see another player with a 5 star badge not using that weapon
The Second Great Turf War: Have an entirely inkling or octoling team. No Mix and match.
Party Time!: Begin/join a Squid Party
Hunting season: Have 4 or more chargers in one match, not including you
Goodbye, cruel world: See someone fall off stage whilst not in combat
Purely Ordinary: win a match without the use of your special
RISE OF KINGDOMS: reach ruler rank
God Save Us: Have a match with 4+ of the same special
The Ultimate Survivor: win a match without getting splatted
Caption this Meme