It's non canon zone time

Maddi: "THE SALMONS ARE COMING FOR US ALL!!!"

Matt: HUH?!

Maddi: "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEEEEE!!!"

Matt: oh again?

Nacla: hello~

Matt: um... Hi?

Nacla: you’re that Matt guy… who’s trying to kill her, right?

Matt: Kill who?

Nacla: my gf

venus

Matt: where the hell did you get that idea? I simply don't care about her

Nacla: *shrugs* idk

but you look good~

Matt: oh thanks

Nacla: *swiftly hits him in the head with a hard metal object*

Matt: of course-

*Falls*

*she brings him to a room and ties him up*

Matt: oh f**k

Nacla: *keeps him there for five years*

Matt: ...

Nacla: what? Do you miss your wife? Awwww

Matt: to be honest yeah.

Nacla: good, she probably misses you too

Matt: ...hang on didn't you say something about dating ve-

Venus: Honey~

Matt: MOTHER FU-

Nacla: oh hi hon~

do you think we should let him go yet?

Venus: Hm... no~ We haven't even done it all together~

Nacla: ok~

Matt: *Wakes up*

Nacla: aww you’re awake~

Matt: ...

Nacla: are you ready~

Matt: ready for what?

Nacla: *does the thing*

*later*

Matt: ...I'm so glad this is non canon

Nacla: dw sweetie, anon finds their ways

Me: I f**king hate you this isn’t canon

Matt: i'm numb to it at this point

Nacla: well then you’re perfect~

Matt: go***amn it-

*skip*

Matt: ...now can I go?

Nacla: I don’t think so, what do you think hon~

Venus: We should keep him like a pet!

Matt: i'm going to kill myself and let Ares kill you

Ares: keep me out of this non canon

Nacla: that’s a great idea hon!

And we just can’t let him kill himself

Matt: Mother fu-

Nacla: :3

(dementia)