ultradude has come to save (ruin) your oc’s day!!

Amber: !?

Ultradude: I’M F**KING ULTRADUDE, HAHAHAHAHA

Amber: …okay?

Ultradude: …you aren’t the slightest bit fazed by my wacky antics?

Amber: im just confused on why you are here

Ultradude: …where exactly are we?

Amber: my home

Ultradude: …oh. Then you’re not gonna like how I got here

Amber: …how

Ultradude: Don’t look up.

*there is a hole in the ceiling*

Amber: *looks up* WHAT THE F**K-

Ultradude: *from outside the house* sucker!!!!

Amber: BE CAREFUL OR ILL FILE A LAWSUIT

Ultradude: *runs away* IM FREEEEEE

Amber: -_-

Ultradude: *gone*

Ultradude: …sorry

Amber: YOU BETTER BE PAYING FOR THIS

Ultradude: *in an annoyed and childish voice* Fiiiiiine.

Amber: -_-

Ultradude: *grumbles* Can you just call the police on me instead? I don’t like spending money on shit

Amber: YOU'RE THE ONE WHO BROKE INTO MY HOUSE!! WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO SUE INSTEAD!?

Ultradude: NONONO, IT’S TOO SCARY TO GET ARRESTED-

Here. *gives her money*

Please don’t hurt me

Amber: *sighs, she feels bad now* keep the money, I'll figure out how I'm gonna pay for this myself

Ultradude: Okay, bye
(takes out a grappling hook and tries to pull himself up to the hole, but accidentally makes the hole bigger)
Ultradude: Uhh
(just goes out the door)

Amber: -_-

killmote:uh oh,i guess you didnt get my warning,now you shall get swiwwessed

X: oh reeeeeeaaalllyyy?

Blook: "I'm a fed"

PieKiller: I have a bounty

*Vernon and five other mercs surround Ultradude.*
Vernon STATE TOUR REASON BEFORE WE STATE A REASON FOR YOUR AUTOPSY!

Ultradude: The f**k did I do?

Merc: Hello? You broke into our bunker for no rhyme or reason.

Switch: "..."

Ultradude: You’re quiet

Switch: "my friends say that im too loud sometimes-"

Ultradude: Woah woah woah quiet down a bit

Switch: *whispering* "Ok..."

Matt: how did you get in my house-

Ultradude: Oh, so you’re one of those people who just ask questions all day. THE Ultradude enters your home, and you just don’t care, and instead ask how I got here.

Matt: I mean, it's every f**king day I get someone inside my house, so how tf did you get in

Ultradude: Uhh… a magician never reveals his secrets. Also, don’t look at your bedroom window.

Matt: *turns around* ...I just changed that window yesterday...

Ultradude: I SAID DON’T LOOK AT IT DUMBASS’

Matt: OKAY GET THE F**K OUT! I BET YOU'RE NOT EVEN A GOD OR A ROBOT OR ANYTHING! YOU'RE JUST A GUY IN A SUPERHERO OUTFIT!

Ultradude: …damn

Matt: GET OUT NOW BEFORE I CALL THE POLICE!

Ultradude: If I was scared of the police, I would have been thrown in prison 10 years ago.

Matt: ...that is very fair. Just give me 5 bucks for the window...

I bet you love rping as ULTRADUDE‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️🔥🔥🔥🔥🗣🗣🗣🤫🧏

it’s the best thing since cocaine

Ultradude: *leaves*

*from outside* HAHA, I GOT AWAY FROM YOU BLUE DUMBASSES, F**K YOU!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAA

Matt: *puts clear plastic on the windows*

Ultradude: *spits out coffee*

…what the f**k, I don’t drink coffee

Anyways,

5 BUCKS?! NO JUST CALL THE POLICE INSTEAD

Matt: Okay. *picks up phone*

Ultradude: Just don’t tell them it’s me they’re after, lest you care to have more windows broken by grenade launchers and rifles.

Matt: I'm just going to say a random hobo broke into my house

Ultradude: …I have a home. It’s the park bench outside the local 7-11.

Matt: My point stands. The police are on their way

Ultradude: Yayy

*the police arrive*

Matt: officers, please escort this man to either a homeless shelter or a mental facility

Ultradude: Actually, I think i’ll just leave. Please don’t look at the jumble of cloth and spandex hidden behind my mask

*he has taken his cape and mask off to make it look like it isn’t him*

Matt: okay I'll wait