"Membio, you are here by accused of the following crimes: 90M counts of Arson, 10 counts of speeding, 379 counts of Murder, 69 counts of Sexual assault, 420 counts Assault, 430 counts of Attempted Murder, 80 counts Trespassing, Breaking and Entering, Burglary, Robbery, Operating Heavy equipment without a License, Under-age drinking, DUI, Driving without a permit, having a concealed weapon within a licence, having military grade artillery, Stealing a Surface-to-Air Missle, Stealing a Fighter jet, Selling F-14 parts for profit, Setting The White House on fire, inciting a riot, inciting rebellion, Slavery, stealing WiFi, Grand Theft Auto, stealing from a police officer, impersonating Law Enforcement, threatening a Judge *cough*me, Treason, Shooting Unarmed civilians INTENTIONALLY, stealing utilities, Stealing Classified Information, selling Classified
Information on eBay, impersonating Government Officials, Stealing an unrevealed aircraft *INHALES*, Road Rage, School shooting, Police Collision, Hunting out of season, intentional collision, Hate crimes, War crimes (nuking, unnecessary suffering, ect.) Destruction of property, Death threats, stepping on grass in a no step zone, not yielding to emergency vehicles, intentionally blocking traffic, vandalism, stealing a pink flamingo, petite theft, and attempting to help a suicidal person (me)."
