Bing AI's try:
And lo, the Lord spake unto them, saying: Thou shalt not put thy bread with butter and nuts into the device that playeth the moving pictures. For it is an abomination unto me, and it will cause thy device to malfunction and cease working. But if thou hast done this thing in ignorance or folly, then hearken unto my words and do as I command thee. Thou shalt unplug the device from the wall, and take it outside into the open air. Thou shalt open the device with a screwdriver, and gently remove the bread with butter and nuts from within. Thou shalt not force it out, nor break any part of the device. Thou shalt clean the device with a cloth and some alcohol, and make sure that no crumbs or residue remain. Thou shalt close the device and plug it back into the wall. Thou shalt pray unto me for forgiveness and mercy, and hope that thy device will work again. Thus saith the Lord.
