Onan: First off, we've got some strange things happening in northern Alumphia. Apparently, the government is keeping close secrets on reports of an anomalous occurrence. You know what that means, folks - aliens. The little green men have finally decided to show up and say hello. And honestly, I can't blame them - I'd want to stay as far away from Del and THP as possible, too. Of course, we don't know exactly what's going on yet, as they’re being very secretive about this. It could be something totally innocuous, like a bunch of cows getting loose and causing chaos. Or it could be something more... exciting. Maybe they've discovered a secret underground bunker full of Twinkies and Mountain Dew. That would certainly be worth keeping quiet about.