Rotis

Milk: "Oh, sup."

so, milk, what's it like being a sentient milk carton?

"Kinda cool, I guess. I mean, everyone belittles you for being short, but at least I'm amazing at hide and seek."

fair trade, i guess.

"Yeah. I also get called a cannibal for drinking milk. I mean, I need it to survive."

interesting.

"Yep. All this milk in me's gotta stay fresh, I don't want it to expire. I'd smell bad. And nobody likes smelling bad, besides OJ."

oj likes smelling bad?

"She's honestly doesn't care about her own well-being. Not because she's depressed or something, but because she just doesn't know how to care for herself."

how strange.

"Yeah. OJ is...special. She's so destructive, I literally have to put her on a leash when we got outside, to stop her from killing everyone in sight."

let me warn you. someone out there's into that.

"I know, but I don't want her to just kill people, and she needs some sunlight from being in that cult in our garage that worships her."

...oh dear.

"Yeah.."

is there anything else you'd like to add before the show ends for tonight?

"Oh yeah, shoutout to Illy, this pink triangle lizard chick, for getting me dragged in with doing her chores. It was a cool adventure, we fought eldritch beings."

you heard that, folks! (especially you, illy!) that wraps up the show for tonight.