(Prerecorded 8:30pm EST)

Hellloo!

*The audience cheers because the sign above the stage says "Cheer".*

Onan: Well, welcome to the show

Thank you, thank you. *I sit down at the seat across from him.*

Onan: So, can you tell us about this look?

Hm? Oh, yes. I actually found this new outfit in the changing room. Fits the character.

Onan: Huh. So turns out there IS useful stuff in there besides all my suits.
*Laughter*
Onan: So, you've been gaining a bit of fame in MSMG recently, taking on this new... gothic... character. Could you tell us a bit about that?

Well, to be completely honest, I've been here for like, 2 years now. In Msmg, of course. Soon I'll have been on Imgflip for 3 years on January 9th.

Onan: Oh, good for you. So, do you have a fascination with decapitating dolls?

Yes, mostly barbies. Or cabbage patch dolls, whatever I feel like.

Onan: Whatever you do, don't decapitate anyone on set, okay?
*Laughter*
Onan: Do you have any reason for this?

I've always found dolls unsettling. I don't get what entertainment children find in them. So, I turn them into something much more... tolerable.

Onan: Tolerable? Like, the (my show) tolerable or...

*Laughter*

Something I can look at without having to vomit. Anyway, how about you? What inspired you to do this, talk show?

Onan: Ever since I was young, I always wanted to be a comedian. I ended up becoming the comedy writer for a few sitcoms, eventually BBC found me and asked if I wanted to do a show, and I did it for a Scooby Snack.

*One person laughs*

Onan: Uh yeah, so what's family life like?

*I smile.* Family life... well, Uncle Fester recently got arrested for bank robbery. And my parents seem to be doing fine, but I can't say the same for Pugsley.

Onan: *raises eyebrow* Bank robbery?

Oh, don't worry Onan. He got out.

Onan: ...
*audience laughter*
Onan: I'm just going to move on and pretend you never said that.
*Laughter*
So what's going on with this Pugsley guy? Did you cut off his head? *laughter*

Pugsley is soft and weak. He's too emotional to be a brother of mine. He's one hell of a pushover at school, and I have to come to his rescue every time.

Onan: Well that's all the time we got tonight, thank you very much, Ms. Addams. You get this set of 12 Amish dolls to decapitate or whatever you do with these. *hands box* Thank you very much, and you *points at camera* stay tuned for Deer_in_a_slime after these messages.

Onan: Damn, imagine insulting your family on live TV.
*laughter*
Onan: Well, let's see here, uh... *flips through papers* Describe "rescue" I guess.