no, you will not

" * WAIT WHAT- "

i'm totally uncapturable
you, like, can't capture me

" * WHAT ABOUT PUZZLES? "

i love puzzles!!

" * SAME! "

where are the puzzles

" * FIRST ONE- TACOS "

where

" * OVER THERE- BY THAT BOX- AND THAT NOT SUS BUSH- "

*runs over to the box*

" * =] "

*looks for puzzle*

* There it was, the tacos were under the box *

*slides over to tacos*

* The box fell on you. Nothing else *

" * OH MY GOD I CAPTURED A HUMAN!!! "

"0["

" * YAY! ALPHYS IS GOING TO BE SO HAPPY! THEN I CAN GET INTO THE ROYAL GUARD! THEN EVERYONE WILL WANT TO BE MY FRIEND! MWEHEHEHEH! "

*tries to escape the box*

* Somehow, It's being held down *

" * ? "

*i, like, can't see*

" * HMMMMM.... NOW I JUST HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL ALPHYS GETS HERE... "

*internal screaming*

" * HOPEFULLY MONSTERS WILL ACTUALLY BE MY FRIEND NOW- "

"Do you just want a friend?"

" * HUH-? "

"Is that all you want?"

" * OH.. UH... WELL I ALSO AM TRYING TO BE AWESOME LIKE ALPHYS! B U T. . . . . I. . . OVER HEARD ALPHYS AND UNDYNE TALKING AND... AND SHE SAID I COULD NEVER BE IN THE ROYAL GUARD . . . . I AM TO. . . . 'WEAK' . . . "

"Oh. I'll stay here then."

" * ...OKAY... "

*waits*

" * I.... I DON'T THINK SHE'S COMING "

"You can just, like, take me.}

((*"))

" * OH! I GUESS I CAN- "

*falls asleep*

* He removed the box *

" * ALRIGHT HUMAN- UH... HUMAN? "

*asleep*

" * HMMMM.... "

*like, stuck to the box*

" * STRANGE "

...

* He picked up the box [and you] *

.

" * HMMMMM

*like, sleeping and stuff.*

" * I GUESS I CAN TAKE THEM BACK TO MY HOUSE SO THEY DON'T HAVE TO STAY OUT IN THE COLD.. "

*yaasssss*

* " HMMM ALRIGHT... "

* He started walking to his house *

*👍*

" * HMMM- "

*totally not awake*

" * MAYBE CAPTURING A HUMAN WAS USELESS ... "

*fake snoring*

" * ? "

*louder fake snoring*

" * WOW- "

*getting louder*

" * UHHHH- "

*stops*

" * STRANGE "

"Hmm, yes, very strange."

" * !? "

.

" * OH YOU'RE AWAKE- "

"Yes, yes I am."

" * OH-.."

"Nightmares strike."

" * I'M SORRY THAT HAPPENED "

"Is fine."

" * OKAY... "

...

" * ANYWAY... "

"👍"

" * WE ARE HERE! "

"Huzzah."

" * MWEH HEH HEH- "

*falls out of box*

" * OH NOOO "

"I can change between human and not human at will."

" * WHA- "

*becomes cool*

* HOLY-

"Totally epic gamer status."

* WOW-

"Yes."

* COOL!

"Yeah."

* ^^

" 0]"

* NOW- I GUESS YOU CAN GO..

*walks away*

* GOODBYE HUMAN- OR MONSTER...

*activates rocket mode*

* !

*ascends*

* Wha-

*explodes*

* OH GOD

..

* OH NO-

*gone forever*

* NOO