Lmaooooo good luck-

Hey buddy. Behind you. I am not being absorbed again.
*i transfer to human form*

Sans - N O! *whisper* IF YOU SAY ANYTHING ABOUT CHARA EVERYONE WOULD FREAK OUT! PLUS IF YOU SAY ANYTHING ABOUT ME BEING THE JUDGE PAP AND UNDYNE WOULD GO CRAZY AND I COULD LOOSE MY JOB!

*Not you, just revealing the flower's identity.

Sans - *whisper* STILL! EVERYONE WOULD FREAK OUT! YOU CAN'T DO THAT!

* Flowey remembers how powerful Sans was, and we need drama so- Flowey released Sans, but grabbed you (me about to pull a Flowey Possession)*

...
Bro you serious
That was a terrible idea.
Look around you.
*about 19 clones surround the area*
That wasn't me mate.

Sans - Why would you let ME go?

Flowey - Genocide remember? When Frisk did genocide you showed the fact that your the strongest- other then me- So- *Insert Flowey Possession sht*

You're disappointing...
You shoulda possessed me.
Lemme give you an example.
*a blue attack goes straight through Sans preventing him from moving (especially his hand), and flowey has several tridents tangling his roots*

* HEY! WHAT THE-

(Ima just do "*" for flowey possession)

This is what happens...
When other people try to screw with the timeline.
Now.
Let go of Sans before I force you to do something unique with a Tem.

* TF- HELL NO-

*His grip got tighter, only causing Sanses bones to slightly crack *

Pap - !

Flowey. Flowey.
You're making a terrible choice.
I have worse ideas.
How do you feel...
About losing your face?

Asriel - True-;

Undyne - *yep we are totally going to ignore what that rando human and Sans just yelled abt- yep- >.>*

...
They don't know me...
It doesn't matter what I do.
Even tori barely recognizes me..
This place has a curse on it. Or maybe I'm the only cursed person. I've remembered everything since this place began existing. Only one guy has truly experienced as much suffering as me and few remember him. Yet I still have to carry on with most of myself scattered across the multiverse. I have a job to do, despite the phantom pain of all sorts of things from being on fire to having every bone in my body shattering spontaneously... how I put up with it?
The cyan glow in my eyes, it gives me a resistance to all of this... Consumption of blue objects keeps it shining, and therefore raw torture at bay.
...anyway. my job is to be one of the six SOULs to absorb by, well, you. That's the only reason I'm even here.. my fate is forever postponed, nothing allows me to end it all. Every piece of me would have to die at the same time... No reset alters it, obviously.
...
Why am I venting to someone who barely knows me..?

Asriel - holy crap-

Asriel, can I ask you something..?

Asriel - Sure!

What's it like... having a SOUL?

Asriel - Nothing changes tbh..

No..?
You mean that beings with SOULs don't feel emotion either..?

Asriel - Some don't

...
Okay...
I'd ask you something else, but only the man with stats over 60k can answer...

Sans - T^T

Also yes I said 2.
There used to be 10 but a but of magic and now there are wait- 28?
Nevermind everyone gets 4 pies!

Sans - Oh-?

Well uhh-
Wait sorry, 32. I need my share as well, haha! So shall we eat?

Sans - Eh- You have ya pies-

Why didn't you want any..?

Sans - . . . not in the mood

I see...
Well, eat to your hearts' content!
I guarantee most of you won't be able to eat all four of your own.

Sans - Wait wait wait wait- I BET I CAN- * seems he has more... determination? Strange... last time you saw him he didn't have ANY *

..?
Have at it!
*4 more pies of equivalent deliciousness appear*

Asriel - WHAT WAS THAT-???

Then I guess you don't know who I refer to.
Ah, whatever. For an eligible god, you have much to learn about this universe..

Asriel - Wha-???

...
Anyway. There's a bscotch-cinnamon pie or maybe ten in my comically large oven..

Asriel - Oh-

I hear that too much of the stuff does something weird and I wanted to find out, and one slice of 6 adds up to all hp being healed.

Asriel - Yeah

So, how shall it be split?

Asriel - *shrug*

I've never seen anyone eat a full pie myself.

Asriel - Oh- Hello!

Err...
Hi...

Asriel - ^^

Any idea as to what my name is..?

Asriel - hmmm....

I don't know either, honestly...

Asriel - oh..

Not my entire life...
And deaths...

Asriel - ?

You...
Wanna give me a name?
I know it's weird naming a human but...

Sans - AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE X-EVENT

That's actually incorrect.
I just was never significant enough to get screen time, they just focused on your little team. It sucked having to babysit literally every other AU that wasn't affected AT THE SAME TIME.

Sans - !

Way... Too many dusty worlds..

Sans - Well that isn't the worst- *shudders in fandom*

I dunno, next time you have about 100 murderous skeletons breathing down your back tell me how it feels. Besides that, there were about the same amount of hni hellspawns.

Sans - I HAVE HAD TO BABYSIT... *looks at Pap then back to you* you know who- *lst*

That's who... I was referring to... except including each version of it. I think there was like 69 of them, ironically. It wasn't easy. And by AUs I mean that every single unique person there I took care of.

Sans - no no no no- I had to deal with all of them at the same time... I also had to deal with angry YanBerry, and Shattered- *shiver* X-Tale Gaster tried to possess me- That wouldn't end well- Plus I have to deal with Genocide routes and resets at the same time- Then we had the Christmas Party which was... Stressful- Ya know what I'm going to ask Blue for more of that punch I want tp forget everything-

Alright, im gonna narrow this down to just this world. Look, at least you forget everything after the kid true resets. AT LEAST YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR FATE IF YOU SO CHOOSE. IF NOTHING ELSE, AT LEAST PEOPLE REMEMBER YOU. YOU'RE THE FRICKIN ICON FOR THIS WORLD. NOW WHO THE HELL AM I, HUH? I WASN'T EVEN GIVEN A NAME!

Alphys - H-how can S-sans be t-the smartest?

Sans - heh-

Have you ever read his joke/quantum physics book?
Ask him anything. He knows nearly everything down here.

Alphys - O-Oh- U-uh okay.. H-here's o-one I barely know.. What's the equation for quantum physics?

Sans - Oh that's easy- A common one is ħ = h/2π

Alphys - W-wha-

Sans.
Explain to me why Toriel does 4 or 5 damage with an attack Stat of 80, while Undyne does about the same with 10 atk.

Sans - Hmm... Well Toriel's code makes it so she doesn't want to hurt Frisk, Undyne.. Heh... Undyne secretly hoped that the human would stay alive.. Isn't that right?

Undyne - Well-..

And the *cough* THINGS in alph's basement do 7 damage with unknowable statistics. Though one has -1 atk.

Sans - I have met them before- one looks like a deformed dog- seriously Alph, when are you going to tell the amalgamates families?

Anyway, I noticed something else down there.
A small room cut away from the rest of the lab. How is anyone supposed to read entry 17..?

Sans - ☜︎☠︎❄︎☼︎✡︎ ☠︎🕆︎💣︎👌︎☜︎☼︎ 💧︎☜︎✞︎☜︎☠︎❄︎☜︎☜︎☠︎
👎︎✌︎☼︎😐︎ 👎︎✌︎☼︎😐︎☜︎☼︎ ✡︎☜︎❄︎ 👎︎✌︎☼︎😐︎☜︎☼︎
❄︎☟︎☜︎ 👎︎✌︎☼︎😐︎☠︎☜︎💧︎💧︎ 😐︎☜︎☜︎🏱︎💧︎ ☝︎☼︎⚐︎🕈︎✋︎☠︎☝︎
❄︎☟︎☜︎ 💧︎☟︎✌︎👎︎⚐︎🕈︎💧︎ 👍︎🕆︎❄︎❄︎✋︎☠︎☝︎ 👎︎☜︎☜︎🏱︎☜︎☼︎
🏱︎☟︎⚐︎❄︎⚐︎☠︎ ☼︎☜︎✌︎👎︎✋︎☠︎☝︎💧︎ ☠︎☜︎☝︎✌︎❄︎✋︎✞︎☜︎
❄︎☟︎✋︎💧︎ ☠︎☜︎✠︎❄︎ ☜︎✠︎🏱︎☜︎☼︎✋︎💣︎☜︎☠︎❄︎
💧︎☜︎☜︎💣︎💧︎
✞︎☜︎☼︎✡︎
✞︎☜︎☼︎✡︎
✋︎☠︎❄︎☜︎☼︎☜︎💧︎❄︎✋︎☠︎☝︎
⑤︎
🕈︎☟︎✌︎❄︎ 👎︎⚐︎ ✡︎⚐︎🕆︎ ❄︎🕈︎⚐︎ ❄︎☟︎✋︎☠︎😐︎

Yeah I know what it says but...
Seriously man, it's just cut off of existence, only findable by browsing code.
Anyways.
Something creepy I've been thinking about. Do you know of any weird ahh salesmen?

* ..... You ask what corrupted DT does

I honestly don't know, it's been incredibly long since I've been crossed between the two...

* You think for a moment.. You ask what traits people and monsters have when they posses corrupted DT. You think about how corrupted DT might be when DT is givin' by force instead of the person or monster getting it by themselves...

Well, Chair possessed pure HATE. I know that for sure, from being purely a determination human. Last I remember, I was running every red light, so I guess they would show their opposite for their normal trait..? A monster's SOUL is of hope normally.

* You told them that Sans was normally lazy and non-determined. You ask if he would posses corrupt DT.

Even if-
You know what, stop talking in the third person.
*I grant the child english*

Disk - ?

Even if he had such, it is simple to remove. Incredibly simple.

Disk - Well.. How did he even get it? He was fine a couple mins ago-

Only source could've been his old man.

Flowey - ????

*Disk opens their eyes, they shine a unrecognizable color*

Flowey - wha-

Ah whatever. Don't you think it's time you Don your striped shirt?

Flowey - HECK NO-

Then why don't I release Sans from those vines and we can all play a little game?

Flowey - Why the smiley trash bag?

Pap - U-uh- Please don't-

Flowey - SHUT UP-

It's a simple numbers game, and he's the smartest one here. Wanna know the only rule?

Flowey - What-?

Alphys - B-but Sans I-isn't a-

Flowey - I SAID SHUT UP-

...
When your hp reaches 0, you lose!
Also, what were you saying Alph?

Flowey - Oh yes, You are...

This is stupid.
Get outta here other humans.
*they teleport out of existence*
Sorry, but you don't get to become a god today.

Flowey - !

Also, I called off every other monster to protect, so at most you become a being with a human SOUL and the main 6. There's another way to settle this, alright?

Flowey - WHAT?!?!?

...
I made this SOUL just now.
It's a unique monster SOUL. Want it..?

Flowey - . . . .N-NO-

...as usual, my work rejected. Look, you old go- no, you're not old, whatever. I know e v e r y t h i n g about you.

Flowey - !

And honestly, I never got to know what you were like before... that. So I intercept so I can maybe know about my Goatbro here.

Flowey - WHAT- NO!!

You know you were about to basically do a god version of that, right?
Why are you suddenly against it now?

Flowey - OI-

...
Man..
I've been bored, okay?
I wanted a different timeline for once..
So many times they've resetted, erased, it just almost hurts to watch and be unable to interfere.
This is why I intercept.
Can we not have a little fun?

Flowey - . . . .

Don't make me remove PLAYER access for a second timeline, please..

Flowey - what-

Oh I forgot, you aren't aware enough. Ever wonder why the kid never shows emotion at all?

Flowey - ?

Well, now the kid will.
*player disconnects from the game*

Asriel - hmmm....

Do me a favor and NOT call me onion...

Asriel - *shrug*

.......
It's fine, just wanted an easier time to pay attention to when I'm referred to...

Asriel - Oh...

Sans - * Now awake * THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I GET POSSESSED PER WEEK-

Cool it.

Sans - SERIOUSLY!!! HOW MANY FKIN TIMES-

This...
Is the first time this week actually.

Sans - BUT SRSLY I HAVE BEEN POSSESSED LIKE- 14 OR MORE TIMES

Sans.
There's worse jit than being possessed.
Once every-so-often I feel the pain of having a piece of me amalgamated with something else.

Asriel - good!

Now, who wants pie?

* Almost everyone raised their hand *

Wait how many people is that...

Sans - It's everyone except me

Oh.
But how many people is that

Sans - Hmmm.... 6?

Okay.
Apparently the kid doesn't want it then..?

Sans - *the one who forgor the kid* UHH- SHT- I MEAN- FK- WAIT NO- *dying inside* ...7...

It's fine. They're behind you anyway...
Well uhh- guess that's 2 whole pies for everyone. Trust me, I'm a good cook.

Flowey - YOU COME ANYWHERE CLOSE TO ME AND I DUST THE SMILEY TRASH BAG

Dust the skeleton and I recreate him.

Flowey - EH WHO CARES- NOW THAT I POSSES HIM I KNOW WHAT HE KNOWS- WHO KNEW THAT HE MET HIS AUS- GUESS I'L GO BUG THEM- *he teleported away, well after a bit, he had some problems at first*

You aren't going anywhere.
*a mysterious force brings him back, then separates the amalgamation.

Flower - HEY-

*I proceed to shove a SOUL into the flower.*

Flowey - NOO-

Look...
It'll only hurt for a little bit, okay?

* Snas from underthetable was passed out bc it takes a lot out of ya when your possessed and almost crushed to death- *

Flowey - FK YOU-

...
Fifth time today...

Asriel - ?

He sadly isn't within this realm...
Odds that I would find him myself are 1 in 1000.

Asriel - oh

Then every time a kid finds it, it unloads after they leave, and I have to run from the coffin to Waterfall undetected faster than they can enter.

Asriel - ?

You'll only know if you can understand the following phrase... if you want to see...

Asriel - Okay!

* Sans eventually came back but didn't say anything *

...
🕈︎☟︎✌︎❄︎ ✌︎ 👍︎⚐︎✋︎☠︎👍︎✋︎👎︎☜︎☠︎👍︎☜︎ ☞︎⚐︎☼︎ ✡︎✌︎ ❄︎⚐︎ 💧︎☟︎⚐︎🕈︎ 🕆︎🏱︎ ☠︎⚐︎🕈︎📬︎📬︎📬︎ ✋︎ 🕈︎✌︎💧︎ ☺︎🕆︎💧︎❄︎ ✌︎👌︎⚐︎🕆︎❄︎ ❄︎⚐︎ 💧︎☜︎☜︎ ✋︎☞︎ ☟︎☜︎ 😐︎☠︎☜︎🕈︎ ❄︎☟︎✋︎💧︎ ☹︎✌︎☠︎☝︎🕆︎✌︎☝︎☜︎📬︎

Sans - ☟☜ 🏱☼⚐👌✌👌☹✡ 👎⚐☜💧☠🕯❄...

Okay azzy, did you understand a hint of that at all?

Asriel - I bet Sans or Undyne could do it

Yeah, they both have iron stomachs from the amazing spaghetore. [Pap didn't hear that]

Sans - I had to deal with it longer- *shutter*

I've noticed something however...
Over masses of timelines it gets a slight bit better. At this rate it'll taste normal in approximately...
400 quadrillion resets.

Sans - ....hmmm.... but how does it get better? ....

I haven't noticed much other than it being more well-heated over time. When I first saw the first plate, it was on fire.

Sans - oh-

Now the noodles are slowly becoming less stale.

Sans - hmm...

Ah, whatever. The pies are about done..

Flowey - What-

What I mean is, about 8 billion timelines are happening for me right now, and four others are...
.....I need help.

Flowey - >.>

Anyways... uhh... I blame players, not the kid for... THAT.

Flowey - Strange- oh yeah- uh-

I'd rather not deal with the feeling..

Flowey - Still- I hate you-
*insert goofy ahh transform and sht*

....

Asriel - oW-

...hey mate.
I've never uh, gotten to talk to ya personally...

Sans - WELL I WASN'T GIVIN' A CHOICE- OH YEAH SURE LETS BLAME THIS ALL ONE THE VIDEO GAME CHARACTER WHO HAS TO DEAL WITH WATCHING HIS BROTHER DIE SO MANY TIMES THEN MURDERED HIMSELF! OH YEAH LETS PRETEND THAT NONE OF MY CHOICES MATTER BECAUSE I HAVE TO WATCH AS EVERYONE FORGETS EVERYTHING THAT HAS HAOPENED- NO SCREW THIS- THIS IS WHY I GAVE UP- * he teleported away*

...
Life sucks down here...
Azzy, sorry you had to uh- hear that..
I'm going to just...
*sigh*
*mumbling
Forced to watch everything whether I like it or not. I can still see him breaking down, too. What did I do to deserve this, you stupid dog? Why am I even alive eh? Give me one good reason why I should exist.

Asriel - ?

N-nothing...
*I sit down to think about how cruel the world is*

Papyrus - W-what was that about? I have never died!

*Asriel sits down with you*

Pap, the fact that you believe that is a good thing, keep on believing it...
So, who do you wanna bet is the loneliest person down here?

Papyrus - ??????????

Asriel - Probably Chara- Or maybe that duck in waterfall- Maybe Nabstablook... Nah it's probably the duck

Hahah-
I believe it is the snowman.

Asriel - Oh yeahhhh I forgot about him- Probably- Maybe not bc of Frisk but the Duck is kinda.... useless?

If not for the duck we could not get back to Snowdin after falling, until we reached hotland. I've seen it again and again. So many people wanted to restock on cinnamon bunnies to deal with the one who refuses to die.

Disk - Maybe, but there are apparently "AUs"?

Not here. This timeline is quarantined from everything. Nothing gets in and nothing gets out.

Disk - Oh!

So, shall we have pie now?

Sans - YES-

Papyrus - >.>

Disk - hmm...

Whatever, I'm eating now...
*I inhale my first, then remember something*
May this thing protect us.
*it looks like the Delta Rune*

Sans - ?

Disk - >.>

It's a charm. Supposed to get rid of all "unholy" things like curses and possessions and stuff like that.

Sans - ... Oh well sht okay- *he backed away a bit*

...
NOW'S YOUR CHANCE TO BE A [[NORMAL SKELETON]]
*I hold it at him*

Sans - Heh of course I know the [[BIG SHOT]]

Pap - Sans what are you doing???

Sans - Simple [[GREAT SKELETON]] I am being a [[BIG SHOT]]

Anyways.
One of the salesmen said something about checking the phone. But what came out was garbage noise.
If you call in that world you hear it for yourself. It's the exact same sound as when you look at entry 17. This is no coincidence.

Sans - hmmm....