CLASSIC FROM RONALD REAGAN; [A] RUSSIAN COMMISSAR ... WENT OUT TO ONE OF THE COLLECTIVE FARMS. HE STOPPED ONE OF THE WORKERS THERE, AND ASKED HIM HOW THINGS WERE, AND IF THERE WERE ANY COMPLAINTS. 'OH, NO, SIR,' THE WORKER REPLIED. 'I'VE NEVER HEARD ANYONE AROUND HERE COMPLAIN ABOUT ANYTHING.'
'WELL WHAT ABOUT THE CROPS?' THE COMMISSAR ASKED. 'OH,' THE WORKER SAID, 'THE CROPS, JUST GREATER THAN EVER.'; 'AND THE POTATO HARVEST?' INQUIRED THE COMMISSAR.
'IF WE PILED ALL THE POTATOES WE'VE HARVESTED UP IN ONE PILE, THEY'D REACH THE FOOT OF GOD,' THE WORKER REPLIED. THE COMMISSAR REPROVED THE WORKER, SAYING 'THIS IS THE SOVIET UNION, THERE IS NO GOD.'
'THAT'S ALL RIGHT,' THE WORKER RESPONDED. 'THERE AREN'T ANY POTATOES EITHER.'