flashback to when this happened

n o .
a phone isnt a s e x toy

Anything can be a s e x toy if you try hard enough

what about a pillow

Pillow humping bruh

what about my ceiling fan

https://imgflip.com/i/688r32 AHAHAHAHAHA-

what the f**k.

I LOOKED UP "CEILING FAN PORN" DIXHIUS-

you can do that?
*googles nar-cissist porn*

You bold af smh

nothing came up ;-;

What Nar said

how about my alarm clock

It depends on the type of alarm clock
It can have several uses

a large rectangle

Can it vibrate?
Does it have a cord?

it has a cord but it doesnt vibrate

People with a pain kink can use the cord for slapping

thats very specific

I f**ked your mom
She was great

my mom lives in a jar

We need a story time

ill just put it in a comment
you can post it if you want to.

Ok, so i was about 10 years old when i built a lego wall-e, and my dumbass thought "hey i could fit my p**is in there" so i did and it didnt fit, but i realized that there was an opening in the inside so its neck could move. so i put my dick through that hole and while i was doing that, the neck of the wall-e moved so it trapped my dick there. and i was on the verge of crying but while doing so managed to break the neck off so my pp could escape. that same wall-e now lives on the shelf next to my bed. and i get ptsd just looking at it

That's an inspirational story

you tell me a story now

But it counts

once i put my dick into a lego wall-e and couldnt get it out

Well duh
I haven't posted anything smh

pussy porn

U n l e s s .

N O .

BUT WHY NOT

because,
b o d i l y
f l u i d s
and phones dont mix well

Just get a waterproof phone

no
just dont use it as a vibrator

:(

actually no
have f u n with your phone and tell me how it goes

Bet