EEEEEEEEEE

nar pls stahp

WHY

i’m your gf

You are?
Oh... I'm sorry babes I'll stop 🥺

aY wHaT

She said she's my gf tf am I supposed to do

*walks to the gun safe and unlocks it*

What are you doing hun <3?

*pulls out remington 870*
something i should’ve done a long time ago...

Is that a new sex toy?

*walks up to the w**re you’ve been cheating on me with*
yippee ki yay, motherf**ker.
*blows her go***mn head off*

OH MY GOD

B-b-but I wasn't cheating 👁️💧👄💧👁️

f**k me or i will kill myself

*rails you in front of the dead body*

it was a trick
*puts the shotgun barrel in my mouth and pulls the trigger*

Sorry, music distracted me 😫

lulz

BABE NO

*the police come*

*POPO

(that means butt in german)
“this is where you’ll be staying.”

(I-)
BUT I'M INNOCENT

“YOU HAVE TWO DEAD PEOPLE IN YOUR FLAT.”

THE NAKED ONE KILLED HERSELF AND BEFORE SHE DIED SHE MURDERED MY EX

*gets out of the car and follows the poop*

"follows the poop"

;-;;;;

“follows the poop”

i’m posting this

K-

WHAT THE F U C K

“yer goin to jeil...”

THERES NO PROOF

“there are two dead bodies in your apartment, and one of them is naked.”

SHE WAS TRYING TO F**K ME

“which one?”

The naked one

“evidence shows signs of a struggle...”

SHE KILLED HERSELF AND THE OTHER PERSON

“why were you trying to escape, huh?”

CUZ YALL WERE GONNA ACCUSE ME OF MURDER AND I DON'T WANNA GO TO PRISON

“tell that to the judge.”

Naw
*chokes self to death*

*you don’t die*
*sends you a message from heaven that reads, “c’mon nar, don’t give up yet, you gotta escape prison”*

Bro capitalize my f u c k i n g name

Fine ;-;

“we’re here.”

HOW THE HELL DID I MISS

the gun flew out of your hand

TF.....
*jumps out of the window*

*the police arrest you cus we live on the first floor*

Wait it looks like I killed you guys

police officer: OPEN THE DOOR

F**K
*picks up the gun you killed yourself with and shoots self*

*you missed and the police breaks down the door*

AND CAPITALIZE MY NAME

but it’s my a e s t h e t i c .

But it's my n a m e .