i have an alternative
it sounds weird at first, but depending on how well you can focus and clear your mind and all that shit it works
hypnosis audios on youtube
there are some that make you feel high as an after effect but it doesn't f**k up your body and mind permanently like with actual drugs
and some of the people doing it made it sexy so you can now choose between sexy and normal
good normal channels: ultrahypnosis, (sometimes) nimja hypnosis (also sometimes, but the more sexualized audios stand out a little more and you can tell more easily beforehand)
sexy channel: the secret subject
