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Dr. Bright is not allowed to feed anything with peanut butter to Kain.
Telling new researchers that you can tame SCP-682 with a rolled up newspaper and a tummy rub is right out.
No longer allowed to challenge Able to unwinnable games like tic-tac-toe. It was three weeks before Able conceded a draw.
SCP-018 is not to be taunted!
Giving 113 to Diogenes is just plain pointless.
Attempting to disprove 343, to 343, is a horrible idea. Agents are still studying the resulting paperweight, supposedly so heavy that 343 should not be able to lift it.
While it is true that "No one expects the SCP Inquisition!", that is only because there is no such thing.
Dr. Bright is not king of anywhere. Or queen.
SCP-963 is not to be used for recreational or procreational purposes.
Although it is entirely possible to use SCPs currently under control of the Foundation to create tentacle monsters, no.
Not even if Dr. Palmer asks nicely.
There is no market for SCP brand pornography.
No, not even in Germany.
Should not replace the buckshot in Dr. Clef's shotgun shells with any of the following: birdseed, confetti, cake sprinkles, sawdust, or glitter.
The Better Business Bureau is not the correct agency for dealing with containment failures from horrible eldritch artifacts sold by Marshall, Carter, and Dark.
Victims of SCP-217 are not toys.
Nor are they to be used as props at a Steampunk Convention.
Dr. Bright is not allowed to bargain with personnel for their "souls."Not even if he can get them a good deal.
Don't let Dr. Bright get a sample of SCP-379. Let my laptop be the last victim.
Not allowed to go off my medication.
May not use any form of the word 'accident' as an excuse.
Violate the dress code, even on 'casual' Fridays.
No matter how many times you say please, Dr. Bright, we won't put any of the hats you've been asking about into the dress code.
If an SCP file says never to do something, it is not because we want to control your mind. Yes it is.
No, it's not, and Dr. Bright may not edit this document.
SCP-437 is not to be handed out as weaponry to unsuspecting new researchers.
[DATA REDACTED ON O5 REQUEST]. Not even for recreational use.
Not allowed to send Nigerian-esque spam email to the Church of the Broken God.
Not allowed to lead a Mobile Task Force against the UIU under any circumstances. without inviting Dr. Clef at all. In fact, just stay 500 feet away from any Mobile Task Force at all times.
Not allowed to end reports with lyrics from "The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air".
B
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MY RESPONSIBILITIES; ME