Claim Your Husbando

im not gay but...

welcome to the internet
have a look around
anything that brain of yours can think of can be found
we've got mountains of content
some better
some worse
if none of it's of interest to you, you'd be the first

Welcome to the internet
Come and take a seat
Would you like to see the news or any famous women's feet?
There's no need to panic, thus isn't a test haha
Just nod or shake your head and we'll do the rest

Welcome to the internet, what would you prefer?
Would you like to fight for civil rights
Or tweet a racial slir
Be happy!
Be horny!
Be bursting with raaaaaaaaaaaaaage!
We've got a million different ways to engage

Welcome to the internet
Hold on to your socks
Cuz a random guy just sent you photos of his cock
They are grainy and off-putting
He just sent you more
Don't act surprised, you know you like, you w**re

Welcome to the Internet
Put your cares aside
Here's a tip for straining pasta
Here's a nine-year-old who died
We've got movies
And doctors
And fantasy spooooooorts
and a bunchofcoloredpencildrawingsofallthedifferentcharactersinHarryPotterfrickingeachother

See a man beheaded, get offended, see a shrink
Show us photos of your children, tell us every thought you think
Start a rumor, buy a broom or send a death threat to a boomer
Or DM a girl and groom her
Do a zoom or find a tumor in your-

Here's a healthy breakast option
You should kill your mom
Here's why women never frick you
Here's how you can build a bomb
Which power ranger are you,take this quirky quiz!
Obama sent the immigrants to
vac
cin
ate
your
kids

Could I interest you everything all of the time? A little bit of everything all of the time? Apathy a tragedy and boredom is a crime! Anything and everything all of the time

Could I interest you everything all of the time? A little bit of everything all of the time? Apathy a tragedy and boredom is a crime! Anything and everything all of the time

You know...it wasn't always like this..

not very long ago
just before your time
right before the towers fell
circa '99

My friends call me Bo Burnham at school

Lol