plot twist

i’m moving to florida

i’m dying in eureka

mood

i’m supposed to be in tucson

Cool, mine's in Ohio

ohio is for lovers

Or rather, so 2 years ago...

Yeah, it is. I used to think it was Chicago, but that place is SO last season.

i tried to have a conversation there, but it was dead on arrival.

Yeah, the place's (shipped) gold standard has really dropped.

It's sad how the mighty fall.

i went there on saturday

Oh, on An Evening Out With Your Girlfriend?

yep. but then, the plane we were on started going down, and then i started sending postcards.

Oh, I could help you out. I got enough miles to fly you home on my own, but you know me: I like being all alone.

the plane crashed under the cork tree, it wasn’t any wave

I bet the crash was Short, Fast and Loud.

Still better than Cooperstown. I slid headfirst into it on a bad bet once.

y’know, where IS your boy tonight? i hope he is a gentleman.

I think he's in Death Valley. I hope he feels better, he has a caffiene cold

I live in Ohio :3

I was making a joke lol
My heart is in Massachusetts