I swear I’m not lying please :(

I'm sorry. I don't know what to say. I can't relate to the situation that you're in by any stretch of the imagination. I could say something simple like you'll get through it, but that is a simple platitude and is not comforting at that. And even if the time comes when you'd be able to escape this nightmare that you live in, then what? Where would you go? What would you do? Would you try to apply to a college to study something that you're passionate in? Would you have to get a job in something that you don't necessarily like but it's enough to get you by for a while, or would you join the military, not being left with any other option? Would you think about being a parent to a child, whether biological or adopted and try to be better than your mother, or would you rather just be able to explore the world that you weren't able to?. I will take your word for it, and unfortunately, these types of situations seem much more common than I would like them to be, but I truly wish you the best in life, even though it is highly likely that our paths will never cross.

I did not read that

Thanks.
I honestly have no idea what to do, I’m really not good at anything and I don’t want to have children because I might screw up and act like my mom. The only thing I know I’ll definitely be doing is getting as far away as possible and live by myself because I don’t want to have to rely on my parents for money.

Same :(

And I’m also tired of pretending to be happy

I truly wish the best for you. I'm sorry that the world has been so cruel to you, but once you are able to escape this horrible situation, I really hope that you'll be able to see the beauty in the world (if you can't already. Assuming things can be very dangerous hahaha!). I understand that this is very taxing on your mental, emotional and likely your physical health as well, but hopefully you'll be able to make it out the dark tunnel and see the light on the other side.

Thx