I mean, they must be pretty hard to swallow, right?

just get good

Yes, I'm good now. They really work! You want some as well?

*offers you a few Hard To Swallow Pillagers*
I'll give you these for free!

i dont do drugs man you know what

But... they also work against Covid-19! =D
You want some now? :p
I know you want them... \;)
jUsT cOmE gEt sOmE oF tHeSe PiLlaGeRs. Heheheh... HEHEHEH! \(°v°)/

no man if I take those pillagers I will awake in the gulag fighting for my life

(Whispers:)
Well...
mOrE fOr Me ThEn I gUeSs!

*swallows everything at once*
*chokes*
*runs to the kitchen to get some water*
*almost dies in the meantime*

(A few moments later...)
That... err...
That didn't go very well.

people like you is why soap has instructions

Wait... Soap has instructions? XD
*takes a bite out of a bar of soap*

Those instructions are not for me, but for morons!
I can use soap perfectly! \B)

See?
All my teeth are entirely clean... |:P

Time to wash my hands now. ^v^
*rubs hands together with toothpaste*

hmmmmm I got it look more pillagers over there that should keep him away for a bit

*appears behind your back*
U said somn??? Heh? Heh? U said somn??? I didn't hear it! ~(°v°)~

*sees Pillagers*
OOOOOOOOOOH. -('o')-

*grabs some and puts them in mouth all at once*
yUmMy-YuMyUm!!! |¦P

(Remaining Pillagers: RUUUUUNNN!!! °Ó_ò)
Awww. They're gone now... D:

*appears behind you again*
hEy, I'm BaCk, PaL. hEhEhEh. 8)