I GOT TO THINKING ABOUT HOW ID DESCRIBE DEPRESSION. THE BEST THINGS I COULD THINK OF IS PAIN AND HOPELESSNESS. I DON'T THINK MANY PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THE PAIN PART UNLESS THEY HAVE HAD DEPRESSION. IT'S NOT LIKE PHYSICAL PAIN. FOR ME IT KINDA FELT LIKE WHEN YOU GET SICK AND YOU GO OUTSIDE IN THE COLD. KINDA THAT SHIVERING FEELING. THAT'S THE BEST WAY I COULD DESCRIBE IT. IT'S SO PAINFUL THAT YOU'D RATHER GO THROUGH ANY AMOUNT OF PHYSICAL PAIN TO GET AWAY. EVEN IF IT'S JUST FOR A MINUTE. THEN HOPELESSNESS. THE BEST WAY I COULD DESCRIBE THAT IS YOU FIND NOTHING IN LIFE YOU ENJOY ANYMORE. NOTHING CAN MAKE YOU HAPPY. NOTHING CAN TAKE THE PAIN AWAY. YOU START HEARING ALL THE WORDS THAT HURT YOU IN YOUR HEAD. YOU WONDER WHY ANYONE SMILES OR SAYS HAVE A GOOD DAY. IT'S LIKE EVERYTHING CHANGES AND YOU JUST WANT THE OLD WORLD BACK.