Be grateful, I am trying my best

LOL

“SCP Foundation being jerks intensifies”

Please Sir or Madam im only trying to help

Yes but I appreciate your cure

Gasp* I would love to be cured.

ok you are now cured

HURRAY!! https://youtu.be/QtEljxur6eI

Come on 049, let's get you back in containment

nope nope nope nope

Sigh, I don't get paid enough for this...

im not going

Screw this, it's pizza day, I'm going to the cafeteria

ooh can i come?

No

ok fine then i am going to eat my baguette all alone then

Ok

Wait, are you French?

yes

*Enter dubai intensifies as I try to break out 049*

pog

YoUr "CuRe" HaS cOsT hUnDrEdS oF lIvEs

From what i hear, it can happen just days after UwU'ing

I last UwU'ed a week ago

My GF didnt have any diagnosis of an STD

OoF

Because a plague doctor can cure anything

Except c*vid

Or wait they can, but they wont

I'm talikng about c*vid

covid

I censor c*vid becuz why not

I have westward ligma, also the most common form of ligma, describing an invasive virus that starts from the left testicle and in 2 weeks, spreads to the rest of the male testes, which can include a failure to produce sperm, rendering the p**is useful only for urination, but will not affect the p**is in any way. Only will the testes be affected. Total body infection stirs around a month after the virus, and a week after total infection, survival is slim to none

If cured at the correct time, the ligma is killed, but a 15 year immunity is added, then vaccination options after cures can last 10 years per shot

I know very well the affects ligma has on the male body, a friend of mine had to have his balls amputated, and another one sadly died from ligma

*gives you $1000* now cure me

Ight *Cures you*

You may be a plague doctor, but you will have a special place in my heart, ligma can cost a life, my family, friends, and my crush would all feel bad if i had died to ligma, idk what my girl would do if i had died from ligma

Everywhere i have been would all have been different if i died to ligma

My dad would have most likely built a chiseled-out statue of me for a gravestone, my mom would've placed every last flower on top of my coffin, my girl would have probably cried herself to death, my friends (which are a bunch of weirdos) would have attempted to resurrect me with some kind of ritual.

No one can afford me going 6 feet underground

No one can

If i had to pay you in every last scrap of ancient debris (minecraft netherite ores), i would have. Those $1000 were just savings from my slowly growing YT channel. I thank you to the distance from the sun to neptune and back for curing my ligma

And also, how long will my balls feel numb from that shot

Ohok they don't censor it