St. Vælfentine announcement

*spits out drink*

Spit out my drink? Because I need to laugh, and I can't do that with liquid in my mouth.

Just drink it through a hole. Idk

The only hole in my body that functions as a receptacle for drinks is my mouth. And my mouth is also the organ I use for laughing. I can't use it for both simultaneously.

Carve a f**king hole somewhere in your lungs and just pour the water there. It almost worked when I tried it at the hospital

My lungs only work with air. That's the case with most humans. Fill it with liquid and it goes kaput

*they go

Just saying it works 100% of the time you don't try. That's a pretty good stat

I think it comes from me being both competitive, and introverted, which leads to this weird mix of loud and quiet kid personalities.

In preschool, I was the kid who never talked to anyone.
In elementary school, I was the loud and annoying one.
In middle school, I was still loud and bothersome, but my introverted side was much stronger.
And now, as a freshman, I am the outcast quiet kid.

Almost exactly how I was.

You rebel

Anyways, I actually am in desperate need of sleep, so good night!

I SAID, "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT"!!!

No, you didn't offend me. Don't worry about it.

I pity you then. I quite enjoy it.

I'm religious. Just a different type of religion. Sorry if I was offensive

Well, that's true. But tomorrow's Sunday, which means I'll have to wake up for Church.

Perhaps we both need our rest *assuming we're in the same or adjacent time zone(s)*

It's 11:03 here. Not like that really matters

*laughs in Clone*

Mom come pick me up I'm scared

Well, that is certainly intriguing

Funny, I was somehow able to develop the reputation of being both the loud kid and the quiet kid simultaneously.

I was the loud annoying kid through my years of elementary. In middle school, I was an outcast. And now, I am still the outcast

It works when it works, except when it doesn't.

Because I was the oddball in middle school.

That was actually one of my catchphrases in middle school.

Me, too. I not only hate the idea of killing (most) baby enemies, but also cats and dogs. And then, nearly all my dungeons and dragons characters are total edgelords that are Lawful Evil, True Neutral, Neutral Evil, Chaotic Neutral, or Chaotic Evil.

Aren’t most people hypocrites though?
Cause most people eat meat, which come from animals.
But they hate the idea of killing baby animals.

Well, the meat comes from adult animals. Most of the time.

Exactly. But aren’t adult animals still animals?

Yes, but not as cute as baby animals

True. But still living breathing things. Just as amazing and important as their smaller cuter relatives.

Yes, but they provide much more meat.

And that makes it okay to kill them?

It... makes it more acceptable. There never was a moral issue with killing any animal of any kind or age, but the, "It's so cute it must be protected," instinct often kicks in when dealing with juvenile animals

Adult animals are cute too -v-

Good day / night / afternoon to you too, my good fellow human being.

Depends on who you ask. But I won't argue with you.

Then this conversation has come to an end.
Good day / night / afternoon

You need to go on a hunting trip.

For big old bulls, not juvenile animals

We could start with rodents and work our way up. Preferably, squirrels the bastards keep eating all my fruit off my trees plus they taste like chicken

Ooooohh, yes! Actually, hang up a bird feeder on fishing line between two trees, and cut all their delicious fingers off! Then, because they can't run up trees without their fingers, catch em and put em out of their misery

Or perhaps though less dramatic we could try using a snare.

Sure, that would work.

But seriously, my linguistics instructor hung up his bird feeder between two trees using fishing wire, and the little sons of biscuits can't get a good grip on the thin nylon strands.

Unfortunately, I can't do that with my fruit trees.

Oh, that is unfortunate. Do you live in a wooded area?

No, sadly I live in an urban area.

Or just snipe them, I guess. That works too.

Don't tell the Karens.

Oh, well. Would two fenceposts do the trick, you think? Given they're sufficiently far enough from each other?

My house is enclosed in a fence they use the darn thing like a highway, I'm surrounded by oak trees esthetically pleasing yes, helpful in lowering the squirrel population, no. I'm planning to just plant enough so I can get some fruit I'll most likely have to bag everything.

They're bound to notice the noise sooner or later anyways. But best get some fun out of it first.

Well, if the two points where the fishing line is tied are sufficiently distanced, the squirrels can't jump to it, and they obviously can't hold onto the line. But, if you don't have the space, then I've run out of ideas.