A small Muffin war battle RP

Amber: ALRIGHT, TROOPS!

Waverly: Why is she in charge again?

*The group watches as a column of Mercs march through the ruined streets. They do not see the enemy troops nearby*

Doge Merc: I wonder where those muffin bastards are... I don't get paid enough for just walkin' around!

Amber: I'M IN CHARGE, SO I-

Waverly: Keep it down! They'll hear us!

Amber: Whatever. You guys know the drill. Now GO GO GO!!!

*The doges hear footsteps and wip around towards the direction they're coming from*

Cheems merc: Imd youm hear thamt?

Doge Merc: Bastards are setting up an ambush! Find cover! Do not stay out in the open!

Waverly: Welp, you guys know where we restock at and have supplies. Remember what Vanessa said, using your powers TOGETHER can make you stronger.

Amber: OKAY, ENOUGH OF THOSE INSPIRATIONAL QUOTES! GET OUT THERE AND WHOOP SOME BUTT, SOLDIERS!!!

*The soldiers salute and head off, getting into position*

Amber: Now, for us...

*The mercs see the elemental soldiers crossing the street towards them.*

Doge Merc: They're they are! OPEN FIRE! SMOKE EM'!

*They give fire, the BRRRRRAATTTTTT of MAC-10's, TEC-9's, and Uzis fill the air as the Mercs light them up. Many soldiers go down.*

*Some of the soldiers scream, others hurry to get away*

An Ice Soldier: It's too early, we're not prepared! I'll try and hold them off with an ice wall!

An Electric Soldier: You can't just stay here by yourself!

Ice Soldier: But neither can you! I at least have some sort of protection! They need you!

A Water Soldier: I'm staying with you. You can use my water to help build a barrier.

Electric Soldier: But-

Ice Soldier: GO! NOW!

Electric Soldier: *Gives a solemn nod and motions for the remaining part of the troop to head back to recovery. He walks over and pats the Ice and Water soldier's backs* We need more brave people like you. Good luck, brothers. If you don't come back, I want you to know you won't be forgotten.

Ice Solider: *Gives a small smile and waves off the Electric soldier to safety*

*Behind the gunfire, the Mercs laugh*

Cheems merc: Loomk! They're runnimg!

Doge merc: HAHA! These punks never stood a chance! RUN BACK TO YA MOTHERS, YA COWARDS!

*They spot the two lone soldiers*

Doge merc: Look at those punks... HEY, YOU TWO! YOU TRYNA GET A MEDAL OF HONOR? COME OUT FROM THAT ICE WALL AND DIE LIKE MEN!

Ice Soldier: We're not coming out of here just to be sent on a death mission if we're safer here!

Water Soldier: We're just doing our part!

*The mercs approach the ice wall, guns drawn*

Quieres Merc: We're gonna give you pendejos one minute to give up or we use your corpses for target practice! Got that, mis amigos?

Ice Soldier: No hablo espanol

Water Soldier: One minute it is

((NEW THREAD))

*The mercs reach the ice wall and put the two loners in their ironsights*

Doge merc: Alright, hands up and maybe I won't shoot you...

Ice Soldier: What're you gonna do then?

*The mercs laugh*

Doge merc: Interogate you, gamer, what do you think?

Water Soldier: Alright...

Ice Soldier *takes the wall down* Don't shoot.

Doge merc: Very good... Now hands behind your head and don't move.

*He shoulders his gun and pulls out zip ties, he puts them around their wrists*

Doge merc: I dig the effort of charging submachine guns with no weapons... ya'll crazy people...

Ice Soldier: No weapons, eh?

???: ALRIGHT, LET'S LIGHT THIS PLACE UP!

*there's lightning and flames thrown at the mercs*

*The mercs jump and give fire in the direction of the suprise attack. The doge merc grabs the two prisoners and puts them in front of him as shields and begins advancing back to his unit*

Doge merc: PULL BACK A BIT AND GET EYES ON WHAT THE HELL THAT WAS!

*the elemental attacks still rain, and now there are shadows reaching up and attacking the mercs*

*The mercs are thrown into panic and fire wildly in all directions, a cheems merc is grabbed by a shadow and dragged away*

Cheems merc: HOLMY SHIMT--

*The doge merc yells to the rest of the mercs and grabs the prisoners*

Doge merc: GOOD GOD! FALL BACK, FALL BACK!

???: THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT! LET THE TWO SOLDIERS GO! NOW!

Doge merc: WHO IN HELL ARE YOU!?

???: YOUR WORST NIGHTMARE! SOLDIERS, KEEP FIRING!

*the attack continues*

*The merc has had enough. He beats the two prisoners to the ground and aims his pistol at them*

Doge merc: ALRIGHT THEN! SHOW YOURSELF OR I BLOW THEIR BRAINS OUT!

???: BLOW THEIR BRAINS OUT AND I'LL DO THE SAME TO YOU! LEAVE 'EM ALONE!

Doge merc: THEN SHOW YOURSELF FIRST! I WILL NOT HESITATE TO PULL THE TRIGGER ON THESE SAD SACKS!

???: How do I know you're being truthful?

Ice Soldier: You don't have to-

???: Stuff it

*The merc starts slowly squeezing on the tigger*

Doge Merc: I mean it! I'll blow thier sorry asses to Brazil! I SWEAR ON IT! I'VE DONE SHIZ LIKE THIS BACK IN IRAQ AND PAKISTAN! NOW SHOW YOURSELF AND FACE MY COLUMN LIKE A MAN!

???: Alright, then. *they stand right in front of them, a mask over their face* Let 'em go.

*The merc backs away from them, but keeps his gun trained*

Doge Merc: How bout' you take off the mask as well?

???: I did what you asked, I'm not going to add more to that

Doge merc: Ok, then let's bump up the pressure.

*He pulls out a radio and talks into it, a few minutes later, the small figure of a jet fighter appears in the skies above them.*

Doge merc: That jet is carrying two thermobaric bombs. It has already spotted the rest of your comrades. All I have to do is say the word and that jset rains hellfire upon your silly band of fighters...

((New New Thread!!!)))

???: Fine. If you insist. *the soldier pulls down the mask and shows a misshapen, scarred, and burnt face* Happy now?

Doge merc: OH LAWD. Uhhhhhh. Ok, good! Good...

*He snaps a few photos and puts the camera away*

Doge merc: How did ya get that way?

???: Any of your buisness?

Doge merc: My boss will want an explaination... And plus I'm curious...

???: You can tell your boss some story, I don't care about your curiosity

Doge merc: Don't turn a round, bud...

*The doge merc smirks*

Doge merc: Alrighty then, pleasure talking with ya... Now let's return to our respective sides and--

*He freezes and stares pass the soldier.*

Doge merc: Oh. Oh no...

((NEW THREAD))

???: Do you REALLY need my mask off? I mean, what good would it do you...?

*The merc pulls out a camera*

Doge merc: Some nice photos to send to the boss.

???: Mmm, yeah. A nice "pretty" picture huh?

Doge merc: Yep. Think the boss will give me a raise, enough money to help my family back at home.

???: Probably not

Doge merc: Well, worth a shot, eh?

???: Not really

Doge merc: Ok, this is dragging on. Take off the damn mask and show your face or the thermos turn your bois into walmart-grade fireworks.

???: Let them go, first

Doge merc: C'mon now, don't be shy.

Doge merc: Ok... Gimme a sec...

*He cuts the zip ties and lets the soldiers go free. He readies his camera*

Doge merc: Now... off with the mask.

Doge Merc: Let's see ya smile for the camera!