Hi Malon, I'm sorry that you're going through that. I can't tell you the problems I have as I am a private person, but the one thing I've learned through the years is that there are always people who are facing greater challenges than self.
The following youtube channels have such stories.
MinuteVideos
https://www.youtube.com/user/minutevideosdotcom
Storybooth
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCWENB1OaGA9402PKzEVl0ow
With that said, I want to tell you that there is always a reason to live. I don't know what your problems are, but no matter what killing yourself is not the answer
Right now, you're thinking that there is no hope or purpose for you, but then you see this stream and it exists for a reason. It's not just for you, it's for everyone else. That means you're not alone in your problems.
That means that if you kill yourself, you're not going to be able to help other people who might have greater problems than you do.
You might be the one who saved that life.
But you can't do that if you're dead. And people like me who've had their own lives and issues may not be there, in time, to help.