Well shit

PROTESTANTISM: SHIT HAPPENS BECAUSE YOU DON'T WORK HARD ENOUGH. JUDAISM: WHY DOES THIS SHIT ALWAYS HAPPEN TO US? CATHOLICISM: SHIT HAPPENS BECAUSE YOU'RE BAD. T.V. EVANGELISM: SEND MORE MONEY TO STOP THAT SHIT. ATHEISM: NO SHIT. JEHOVA'S WITNESS: KNOCK KNOCK, SHIT HAPPENS. HINDUISM: THIS SHIT HAPPENED BEFORE. CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: SHIT HAPPENS IN YOUR MIND. AGNOSTICISM: MAYBE SHIT HAPPENS, MAYBE IT DOESN'T. RASTAFARIANISM: LET'S SMOKE THIS SHIT. EXISTENTIALISM: WHAT IS SHIT ANYWAY? STOICISM: THIS SHIT DOESN'T BOTHER ME. NIHILISM: THIS SHIT IS NOTHING