This was actually assigned for homework once. This meme is what went on in my head, but I was too afraid that if I said it, I would get in trouble. My teachers don't tolerate nonsense.
MUSIC TEACHER: OK EVERYONE, FOR HOMEWORK, YOU HAVE TO MAKE AN INSTRUMENT. ME: IS MAYONNAISE AN INSTRUMENT? NO, SAHARA, MAYONNAISE IS NOT AN INSTRUMENT. HORSERADISH IS NOT AN INSTRUMENT EITHER.