I saw in a comment you posted that you wouldn't be back for a few months because you got into that fight to help your friend out. I felt like time was up and hoped you hadn't abandoned the flip! Bless you for returning!
:( There aren't enough sad emojis and broken hearts for that one. I swear we must be cut from the same cloth the way we look at this stuff. I have times where I felt that was me trudging through that swamp as well. How dark are those feelings... I hope you never find yourself there again!