Supposedly Funny Title

"My name is Cave Johnson and I am going to burn your house down with lemons."

My name is none of your damn business and I'm gonna kill you in your sleep via gouging your eyes out with a spoon, as a trophy of my accomplishment, then proceeding to stab the utensil repeatedly into your brain via your eye socket until I have gloves made of blood.

That doesn’t sound like Cave Johnson, that sounds like Friday the 13th.

Actually, it's me. My kill count is over 1200. Though, I did get 13 kills in on Friday.

Ha ha! Good one!

you are truly evil

It's a talent ;)

Lol

Ouch