The Most "Make It On Your Own" Father In The World

And I was a good person. They just never wanted kids to begin with

My parents did too, but I lived in a small town. I couldn't wait to get to the city and go to college. While my parents raised me to be independent, your story is extreme.

Since I moved out, I see my parents once or twice a year and we never talk on the phone. It is kind of like they put in their time also. They were excellent parents while we were growing up though. My brother's story is the same. He is only a 90 minute drive from them and doesn't see them any more than I do.

Everyone has weird family dynamics. It seems like you have made peace with yours.

I made peace with it before it happened as I knew it was coming. I saw all of my friends doing activities with their parents while mine ignored me. They put food on the table and clothes on my back. Gave me a bed to sleep in and that is where their obligations as parents ended. I was prepared for it.

Being ignored and feeling unloved as a child/adolescent is one of the most hurtful things I can think of. If the psychology books are right you will carry that with you and have trouble forming trusting relationships throughout your life. Sorry about the psycho-analysis. I taught attachment theory to my students in the teacher assistant program.

Oh it's had its effect. I'm 45 now and don't have a single friend. And having to take care of myself and live on my own at a young age, you can imagine how bad my credit has become due to desperate measures to survive. I know they are responsible and I learned to stop hating myself only recenrly. My father died last year and the only tears I shed were not for what I lost, but for what I never had.

Your story is very sad indeed. I hope you will learn to make friends. Not hating yourself is a good first step.

That's because it's safe. You might be surprised at the emotional benefits of having one male friend. Even if it is just someone you play crib with or whatever you like to do.

It's all I think about

My advice for what it's worth is to make a list of things you enjoy doing, then look for a club in your city that does that. Churches are great places to form social bonds with others if you are at all religious. If you see the same people over and over at places you go like the gym or certain cafes etc. Strike up a casual conversation. Finally because I am a college instructor, I would be remiss if I didn't suggest taking a night class. I have seen many people form friendships and even romantic relationships in my classes.

Did they at least say "good-bye"?

They gave me notice when the house sold. I moved into an apartment on a part time income as I was still in school. Then they just went away. They were not meant to be parents. I learned that at a young age when I was raising myself

The bad news is, I was literally out in the streets from ages 15 - 20. The good news is my mother has since apologized to me more than once. And the last time wasn't that long ago

I am not holding my breath for an apology. I was scrounging and bumming for bus to go to the food bank while they were touring wine country and getting room service

I'm at a loss :-(

Some people just weren't meant to

Sorry, really, and we at imgflip can be your friends.

I was still in school when I was evicted. Ain't that a bitch.

Sorry, really, and we at imgflip can be your friends!

My reply skillz are lacking - I thought I replied to apesforkoba. :))

No worries. I was gonna do something similar but it felt awkward after the fact when i woke up this afternoon :

I re-replied to the right spot (I hope). This community has a heart. That's rare.

Thank you.

That happens to me all the time too.