"You know son to get to school I had to go all the way to the moon to get my memory wiped so the aliens could test me to rediscover E=mc2 then I had to beat up 5 giants on the way back to earth and had to eat both of my arms to regrow them in a lab then I had to walk through the gobi desert 3 times because I kept taking the wrong turn then I had to wait 20 years to grow a new forest so I could go back in time to make a time machine to then just get some food from my past self then I had to sacrifice my best friend to some space aliens then all I did then was dodge 100 bullets and stop a nuclear war from happening then they would let me into school
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