ME DAYDREAMING ABOUT EVENTUALLY BEING POST-TRANSITION, GOING STEALTH, BEING WED TO AN AFFLUENT TRADMASC BOOTLEGGER, AND LIVING THE REST OF MY DAYS AS A TRADFEMME HOUSEWIFE MAKING CHEESE AND WINE IN A LAVISH NORTHERN ALASKAN ESTATE:; (I AM TRYING TO KEEP MYSELF TOGETHER AND AVOID BEING HOPELESS)