ONCE TAKEN PLACE IN A TERRIBLY DREADFUL TIME, THERE WAS A SMALL CAT-LICKING BIRD THAT LIVED ON A NOT-SO-BIG LANE BY MY HOUSE WHOSE NAME WAS CHARLES JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER SOUL, MALE OR FEMALE, THAT LIVED ON MY SMELLY, STINKY, ORANGE , OLD, ROTTEN, MESSY, BUSTED CUL-DE-SAC BETWEEN BELMONT AND ROSE WHICH ARE BOTH AWFULLY GAY STREETS LIKE NORTH STREET OR SOME SHIT THAT REMINDS ME OF A CELEBRITY LIKE PARIS HILTON OR SOME BLONDE LOSER THAT DOESN'T EVEN KNOW THE CAPITAL OF HER OWN COUNTRY, WHICH IS THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA AKA: THE U.S.A WHICH IS A PRISTINE NATION OF BEAUTY, OPPOSING TO A COUNTRY AS THE COUNTRY OF SOMALIA AND BELGIUM, A PART OF EUROPE, WHICH DOESN'T EVEN HAVE A GOVERNMENT, IT'S JUST IN A COMPLETE STATE OF ANARCHY JUST LIKE MY MIND AND SOUL WHICH ARE BOTH FILLED WITH OUTRAGEOUS NONSENSE THAT I'M TYPING DOWN RIGHT NOW INTO SOME FAT LONG SENTENCE THAT PROBABLY MAKES NO SENSE BUT WHO CARES I'M TRYING TO SET SOME SORT OF WEIRD RECORD HERE LIKE MOST DUCKS SNORTED OR SOME WEIRD THING LIKE THAT AND IF I DO SET SOME SORT OF RECORD I WILL BE IN THE GUINNESS BOOK OF CHIMKIN NUNGETS WORLD RECORDS (THOUGH ANTI-AMERICAN AND PRO-EUROPEAN, A PLACE OF PITTY AND DESPAIR AS SOMALIA IS) WHICH WAS ALWAYS MY DREAM BECAUSE THAT BOOK HAS A WHOLE BUNCH A COOL AND WEIRD STUFF IN IT AND I WOULD BECOME FAMOUS AND ADD TO THE WEIRDNESS OF THE BOOK LIKE SOME OF THEIR RECORDS WHICH REMINDS ME OF THE ROB & BIG WHERE ROB SETS ALL OF THOSE SKATEBOARDING RECORDS AND BIG BLACK EATS BANANAS AND DONUTS AND THREE WEEKS LATER THEY BOTH GET PLAQUES SAYING THE RECORD THEY SET AND I WANT TO GET ONE OF THOSE SO THAT'S WHY I'M WRITING ALL OF THIS STUFF DOWN WITHOUT EVER USING A PERIOD OR SOME OTHER SENTENCE ENDING MARK LIKE AN EXCLAMATION POINT OR A QUESTION MARK OR ANY OTHER SYMBOL THAT COULD POSSIBLY END MY STREAK OF WORDS THAT IS REALLY LONG NOW AND WOULD TAKE ME A WHILE TO COUNT JUST LIKE COUNTING SHEEP WHICH IS SUPPOSED TO PUT YOU TO SLEEP BUT IT REALLY KEEPS YOU AWAKE BECAUSE YOU WANT TO KEEP COUNTING AND COUNTING UNTIL YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT COMES AFTER TRILLIONS, BUT THAT WOULD TAKE YEARS OR SOMETHING BECAUSE IT WOULD TAKE A WHILE JUST TO COUNT A TRILLION SECONDS OR MINUTES WOULD BE EVEN WORSE JUST LIKE HOW DUCKS ARE WORSE THAT GEESE BECAUSE THEY ARE MORE AGGRESSIVE AROUND THEIR YOUNG UNLIKE GREAT WHITE SHARKS WHICH ARE OFTEN EATEN BY THEIR MOTHERS WHEN THEY ARE BORN AND THE ONES WHO DO MAKE IT OUT ALIVE HAVE NO MOTHER TO TEACH THEM HOW TO HUNT OR WHATEVER BECAUSE NONE OF THAT MATTE
